As you may have read before, I take a martial arts class. Its not a particularly nasty one but it has its occasional knocks and bumps. Usually I do OK with these. A bruise here, a finger in the eye there, etc. I've had occasion in the past to have an 'injury' that scared the bejesus out of me. Bejesus, by the way has always made me giggle a little. I don't know why. Its a funny word. But, I digress.
During a test (not mine) last night I attempted to kick a guy. He's a nice guy. Didn't deserve it. But, alas, in martial arts, that's what you do during tests. you beat up on kind undeserving people. He, however, decided he would also kick me at the same time (what did I do to him!?!?!!). This resulted in a collision of shins. Shortly thereafter I had what could only be described as a small dog under my skin on the surface of my shin. It swole (that's a word) to about the size of a mouse. The kind of mouse you use on your computer. Go ahead and set your mouse on your shin. Now, imagine that was under your skin.
Needless to say, I started to freak out. At certain points I went back and forth between the following:
As I look at it now its fairly flat except that its dented. Yes dented. I have actually dented my body. I wonder if Maaco can fix that?
During a test (not mine) last night I attempted to kick a guy. He's a nice guy. Didn't deserve it. But, alas, in martial arts, that's what you do during tests. you beat up on kind undeserving people. He, however, decided he would also kick me at the same time (what did I do to him!?!?!!). This resulted in a collision of shins. Shortly thereafter I had what could only be described as a small dog under my skin on the surface of my shin. It swole (that's a word) to about the size of a mouse. The kind of mouse you use on your computer. Go ahead and set your mouse on your shin. Now, imagine that was under your skin.
Needless to say, I started to freak out. At certain points I went back and forth between the following:
- Ruptured artery
- Compartment Syndrome
- Broken shin bone (I'm sure there's a medical word for that)
- Blood clot traveling to my (insert body part here)
As I look at it now its fairly flat except that its dented. Yes dented. I have actually dented my body. I wonder if Maaco can fix that?
4 comments:
lol! The nerve of that guy! Here you are trying to help him pass his test, and he's throwing kicks!
Exactly why I avoid social situations...
lol - you have the funniest descriptions. "Shortly thereafter I had what could only be described as a small dog under my skin" - lmao!!
You are braver than me--anything that size, I'd have been running to the ER. Hope the dent fills in and you don't have to resort to Bondo. I've had a few dents of my own that did eventually fill in, but nothing with so spectacular a beginning.
I notice your hypochondria attacks tend to include blood clots--that's a favorite of mine, as well. (Current problem, however, is an aneurysm--just another vascular variation).
Blood clots are a particular fear of mine. Especially since I've been getting "optical migraines" which have been associated with a vascular abnormality in the brain, and an increased risk of stroke. Great. I know how to get fit and exercise but anyone know how to keep my vessels in top shape? :)
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